|
RECEIVING WITH AN OPEN HEART TEXT: Mark 10:13-16 Since December, we have talked a whole lot about giving. Through the Christmas season we remembered what God has given to us in Jesus. In January and February we talked about the ways that we respond to God’s generosity with gifts of our own…gifts given back to God through our tithes and offerings, gifts given to those in need on behalf of the Christ whose body we are, gifts given to each other out of simple love and joy. We asked you to write down the gifts you have received from God and the ways that we can respond to those gifts and they are hanging behind me on the two banners made by Cindy Lee Gee. The hands reaching down represent the gifts God has given to us, and in the diamonds are the words you named. The hands reaching up represent our gratitude and in the hearts are the ways you named that we respond to God’s love. Both sets of words are listed in your bulletin. Our theme since July has been “Open Hearts.” Our stewardship theme has been “Imagine the Possibilities,” something that is only possible when our hearts are open. During Advent we talked about the fear that can keep our hearts closed and shut down any hope for future possibilities. We’ve talked about giving as a spiritual discipline and not just a mechanical means of satisfying the budget. We’ve talked about letting go of control and giving our lives—hook, line, and sinker—over to God. This morning, as we come to the culmination of all of that…as we have expressed our open hearts artistically and as we bring our financial commitments to present before God, I want to talk about something that is absolutely critical to our ability to give, and that is our willingness to receive. I've often said we have two great lessons to learn in life -- how to give and how to receive. And each of us tends to be better at one than the other. We all do a little bit of both, but personality-wise, we tend either more toward giving or more toward receiving. The object is to get those things in balance. It's often hard, especially for us as self-sufficient New Englanders, to receive anything at all. Add to that being Christian and learning that it is better to give than to receive, and it gets even worse. We believe that we are called to give, and rightly so. But if our giving is to be healthy, it needs to be balanced by the ability to receive. We give because we have first received from God…that’s why the banner about God’s gifts came first. Spiritual giving is a response to what we have received, and if we can’t receive, our giving can become disordered. We come to think that our giving is some kind of payment for God’s grace or a means of proving our worth. We start to feel that God is demanding our giving and we can grow resentful and even physically ill. Those of us who give and give and give and never receive -- the well empties out. If the well isn't fed from a spring where we also keep receiving, pretty soon we have nothing left to give out. In order to be a good giver, we have to be a good receiver, because we have to have that coming back into you. It's
also critical because if we don't receive, there are some who will never learn
to give. I saw this when I was in a church in Along came winter, and Steve was in church every week, always in the same black t-shirt and some black jeans. That was all he had left, and people noticed that. There was a couple in the church that decided they wanted to help him. Now you have to know, this couple never did things like this. They always seemed to feel that the person in need didn’t deserve help…that they had brought the condition on themselves, would use the help for immoral purposes or whatever. But here was somebody they knew. They knew the story. They knew that he couldn’t help either his situation or himself. They could see him in the same clothes week after week, day after day. So they packed up a combination of the husband's good clothes and new clothes that they had bought, and they went to Steve's apartment. They presented their gift at the door, and Steve said, "I don't need your charity," and he shut the door in their faces. I can tell you that that couple is not likely to reach out and give ever again. If he had only been able to say, "Thank you so much for thinking of me," and they could have seen him come to church wearing some of the clothes that they had given, they would have realized the joy of giving, their hearts would have opened more, and they would have been more likely the next time to reach out and to give again. By his insisting that he didn't need charity and refusing to receive, he cut off the spiritual growth of somebody else who desperately needed to learn how to give. Our giving and receiving are all tied up together. If you have real trouble receiving from somebody else, think of it as a way to give. Think of it as a way to give somebody else an opportunity to learn how to give, and to learn what charity in the true Christian sense is really all about. There's another reason that we need to learn how to receive, which I think is the most important of all. If we don't learn how to receive from other people, we are never ever going to learn to receive from God. In our human relationships with each other, we live out our relationship with God. Our relationships with human beings and our relationship with God are tied together. If we can't do something with a flesh and blood human being, chances are very slim that we're going to be able to do it with a spirit. God says this in I John -- "if you don't love the brother or sister who you have seen, don't go saying that you can love God who you haven't seen." Because loving an invisible God is harder. It's hard enough here in the flesh, but we work it out with each other so that it then becomes possible for us to open to the greater love and the greater gifts. God is the great giver. We need the gifts that God has to bestow on us. But how can we ever receive from God if we haven't ever been able to receive from one another? In receiving, I'm not talking about getting your due--that you do something and you get a reward back, so you feel you deserved it. I'm talking about real gift giving and receiving. Remember that it's not a gift if you've earned it. Then it's a wage. It's only a gift if it has nothing to do with whether you deserve it or not. It comes from the heart of the giver. We experience this to some degree at Christmas time, when we really want to give to those we love--to find something that they delight in. I remember how difficult it was to find gifts for my in-laws, who were very, very bad receivers. They did not want to receive gifts, although they were lavish givers themselves, and it was hard to find something that they could accept. I remember one year, we gave them just some very simple gifts. They opened everything on Christmas morning and said thank you. But when we went to return home, the gifts we had given them were there on top of our luggage. They said, "Take these back. You don't need to be spending your money on us." Even though in their giving it back they were trying to give us something and not have us spend money, it hurt to have our gifts rejected. They didn't mean to be hurtful. But when you don't receive gifts from somebody, it hurts. It hurts the giver and insults the love that prompted the gift. Life is easier if we learn to be good receivers. I can't tell you the number of times that I have sat with someone in the hospital as they are forced to move from being a giver to being a receiver. Maybe they're getting on in years and something has happened, and they are realizing that they're going to have to receive from someone from here on out. Or maybe it's just been an accident or some temporary reason that people who've always been out giving, giving, giving, have got to be dependent on the gifts and care of other people. The physical crisis is enough without adding the emotional crisis of suddenly becoming a receiver. If we can learn to become good receivers early, we can save ourselves some heartache later on. If you are a consummate giver, think of receiving as a gift. Think of receiving as the way that you give to somebody else the joy of giving, learning what that's all about, and how wonderful that can be. Gracious receiving is a gift. It would have been a great gift if my in-laws had been able to graciously receive presents that we gave. Giving and receiving must stay in balance. All giving is not healthy. All receiving is not healthy. Sometimes giving is used as a way of creating an obligation in somebody. A gift with strings attached is not a gift. We've all known people who've given for reasons like that. And receiving can be pure selfishness. We need to keep our giving and receiving in balance and practice them with open hearts. I can’t stress enough that this is a spiritual practice. Our difficulties in human relationships will also be difficulties in our relationship with God. If we can’t receive from others, we won’t be able to receive from God. If we can learn to receive as much as we give, then our Christian lives can be in balance, and we can give as God directs us to give and receive the gifts that God has for us. A little later in the service we will live that out. The communion table is set with the symbols of God’s giving…the broken body and shed blood of Jesus, given for us. It’s the ultimate gift. We will come forward and receive that great gift. Then, as we return to our seats, there will be baskets for you to give back to God…not as payment for what was given…that would insult the giver…but as a sign of our willingness to imitate the sacrificial giving of God in gratitude for what we have received. We've got to give. We've got to receive. We've got to love our neighbor just as we love ourselves. Then we will at last be able to open our hearts to the greatest gift of all, God’s gift of love. Amen. Return to AnneRobertson.com
|